The long-awaited Delta House tour!

So with a little time on my hands this morning, I figured I'd get these awesome pictures of the Delta House up. And, because it's how I do...I'll probably give a little commentary as we go. So enjoy!

The picture at the top of this blog is of the Delta House from the street. The front, I suppose. This is the House from the back...pretty much by the barn you've heard about and seen already. The "front" door to the House is on the left-hand side of the this picture up a little ramp by the garbage cans. It's fun.

To the left of the "front" door, please deposit your butts. SP did his duty a week or so ago by dumping this out. Brave guy that he is.

Just inside the front door, here's the entranceway. To the left of the small bookcase there is the TV room and straight ahead is the dining area. To either side of this front door are small rooms filled with junk and random costume pieces. I'm sure there aren't any random woodland creatures in there. Can you feel the sarcasm?

Here's that aforementioned TV room. Two couches, two easy chairs, a table, and a TV. I'm sitting right where the heating pad is in this picture (the pad has been taken away) and watching "Cash Cab".

Go through the dining room and you'll get to the kitchen. It's...um...brightly colored.

Go the other way through the dining room and you'll get to the hallway leading back to three bedrooms (including SP's room). But you have to get past the crumbling ceiling to get there. That circular thing that's hanging down? It's a smoke detector. Fire laws are played fast and loose in Michigan!

Just before the crumbling ceiling there's a half-bathroom. This picture is the ceiling of that bathroom. The light works, though!

In the dining room is the fridge. At the time this picture was taken, there were four guys living here and a fifth had just left for a job in Pennsylvania. Milk, beer, assorted condiments...it's single guy livin' at it's finest!!

This is the same crumbling ceiling hallway where you can also climb these stairs to the upper six bedrooms. Join me upstairs, won't you?

At the top of the stairs is this odd little room. It has a bunch of random costume pieces on racks and jammed into sinks populating it. At the back of this picture is a doorway. Through that doorway is my "wing" of the House. Three bedrooms and a bathroom (pictures of the bathroom are located on the right-hand side of this blog).

This is the doorway. Room number 4 is off to the right. You can juuuuuuust see into my room there to the left.

This is my room! Lucky room number 5. There's a star on my bedroom door...because I'm a star! Or...something.

And here's where the magic happens. Two beds are better than one so I can sleep catty-corner like always. I like the sheet on the window so I kept it. Really helps to complete the "I'm back in college" feel of my life.

Here is a bedside table that I took from one of the other vacant rooms. Books, my ill-gotten Black Duck, and usually my computer when I'm not sitting on the couch with it.

And this is the view I have from the sheet-covered window. That road is Verona Road in lovely Battle Creek. I wish I could say that it was raining when I took this picture but the weather is ALWAYS overcast in Battle Creek. OK, that's not necessarily true. But it felt like it for a while.

So there you go. For better or worse, a little tour through the Delta House. Hope it was worth it. I'll post more later.

I promise...

I am loved!!

Accomplished today: Performed, went to a Marshall watering hole

So we're well into the run of this thing now and I guess you could say that we're starting to click. This afternoon's matinee was pretty good, actually. It was a huge crowd and they seemed to just love everything that I did. SH made a comment during intermission that I could pass gas on stage and the audience would laugh like crazy. And she wasn't too far off. They just seemed to connect with me somehow and it was pretty enjoyable.

We're all now in somewhat of a groove and the lines that are dropped are just dropped and forgotten and it's actually more of a surprise when someone remembers a long-forgotten line. So we're all just left to make this show more fun for everyone. I'm having fun with it and adding stuff as I go, but it's starting to be fun for others in the cast, too, and that's when the fun really starts. Now I get people to play with on stage! So when I do a little gesture or something to the side of the real action, maybe somebody will play on top of that and now it's a whole performance instead of people with wildly different English accents reciting lines to each other.

So maybe the first few audiences didn't get much of a show...I guess you gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet (or so they say)...but I think the remaining audiences will get a better show because of it. That's my theory, anyway. We'll see if it holds up.

It's freakin' hot up on that stage. I'm a big sweaty ugly mess by about half-way through Act I. But I couldn't do the part with any less energy. Just not possible. I have to be manic and worried and stuff and that requires a lot of energy. Add in the fact that I'm a bit of a sweater, anyway, and you've got yourself a puddle by the end of the show. Hopefully, I can get my hair cut soon and maybe that will alleviate some of the heat. Trim the beard a little bit...that might help, too. Eh, we'll see. Gotta figure something out.

Or else I'll end up melting completely in the middle of some performance come June. Yikes!

A little excitement!

Accomplished today: Watched the response of Battle Creek's finest, officially opened the big show, did laundry

So I woke up this morning and updated the blog, then went downstairs to have a little something to eat and watch SportsCenter. Which I started to do. But then trucks with lights on the top went past on the driveway, attracting my attention. I went out to the porch and towards the back of the House and...lo and behold...there was a fire in the backyard. I guess there was a small brush fire in an adjacent property and it started to get out of control somehow. It was kind of exciting but it sure did seem like overkill. At one point I counted 10 vehicles and up to 15 fire fighters on the scene. It was sort of amazing. Here...I took some pictures...


Why do I look so happy? Maybe because it's early. Maybe because I didn't sleep well. Maybe because there was a fire. Maybe I'm losing my mind and anything was going to be rather humorous. Your guess is as good as mine.

The driver of this truck was late to the fire party. So the cool fire-fighters made him park near the street and walk up the driveway. Ha! Sucka!

You can't see it, but you must trust me...there are flames out there somewhere. But the smoke is pretty thick.

This picture includes the barn so you can tell that it actually took place behind the Delta House. See all the smoke? Kinda cool, huh?

Smoke! And where there's smoke...there's a small brush fire that the Emmett Township Fire Department needed a few hours to control. Isn't that how the old saying goes?


Let's see...what else happened today? Oh, yeah. We had our very first paying audience this afternoon! A decent house, including two reviewers (or so I'm told), who seemed to laugh at most of the correct places. There were some pretty large stumbling blocks in the show, line-wise, but I have to give it to all of us. We got through it. And I think we did well. After every show, three of us have to go out to the exit doors of the house and greet the folks as they file out. Shake hands and smile nicely and stuff. And, of course, everyone said good stuff and seemed to dig it (of course, what were they going to say? You suck?) and one old lady even told me that I had a new fan in her. Which was sweet.

All-in-all, I'll give the show a positive review. Now...we'll see what the two reviewers have to say!

Oh, and I did laundry today. In the car on the way home, with some of the laundry on my lap, I started sneezing like crazy. Never before has an allergy been so obvious to me. I guess I'm allergic to the laundry detergent. Ah, well. Live and learn.

And sneeze. A lot.

This will be a marathon...not a sprint

Accomplished today: First audience!

Well, the Turkeyville crowd came out (I'll estimate about 35 people, maybe) and watched the show last night and with some hesitation I will say that I think they enjoyed it. It's always nice to have the "Friends and Family" preview to reassure us actors that everything is going to be alright and that things are funny and all that nonsense. Now, armed with a view of what the show SHOULD look and sound like (from an audience-reaction aspect), we can open this thing and work our asses off trying to get back to that response we had last night. Or better, hopefully.

It was a rough start to the show. Some lines got dropped, there was a bit too much talk of frozen pastas and such, but eventually the show got on a track and wound its way around to the end. Somehow. I can't be sure, because who keeps track of things like this in the heat of the moment, but I think I might have achieved a personal best by bailing out every one of my castmates from a point where their lines just didn't come. I'm sure I was bailed out at some point, too, but I can't think of when that might have been. But whatever. I guess we were all there for one another and the audience was laughing at all the right places. They even got ahead of us at one point when my character was about to launch into a long explanation of lies and stories and one audience member could be heard saying expectantly "Oh, no, here it comes". That, I will admit, made me feel pretty good.

The one complaint (because it's me and I HAVE to complain about something) would be that it was ungodly hot up there on stage. I was constantly wiping my face with the handkerchief I have with me onstage. Thank God I do a lot of drinking during the show (at least through Act I) or I might have passed out, what with the WOOL jacket I'm forced to wear and the fact that I'm running around like a lunatic for the better part of the act.

Anyway...here are some pictures of the set and the house and other random tidbits. I took these last night before the show.



As much of a close-up as I can get of the set. From left to right, there's a spare bedroom door, the door to the kitchen/dining room (next to stairs going up that you can't see), the bar, the entrance leading to the front door, and then the other spare bedroom.

A wider, darker view of the set to include the tables and chairs...just to prove that this is indeed dinner theater.

And a view from onstage looking out into the house.

And the poster for the show. If you look closely in the bottom right-hand corner of the poster it says "adult comedy". The story is that one of the owners of the place was in attendence last night and said to our director afterward..."It said adult comedy and it was funny as shit". High praise, I'm sure.

So that's about it for now. This afternoon we have our first paying audience and I'm sure the response will be juuuuuuuuuuust a little different. I'll let you know.

I'm not out of the woods yet...literally.

Oh, it's ON!!!

Accomplished today (since the last post): Rehearsed, grocery shopped a little, rehearsed, did run-throughs, rehearsed, and worried like crazy.

Well, so the big first audience is tonight. I'm...scared out of my mind. Since my last post, I've quite literally done nothing that isn't somehow associated with the show. Even if it's just sitting on my bed and worrying like crazy all by myself. Which I've done plenty of.

I just don't know what else can be said. SP and SH are just not getting the lines down. And in a little over 3 hours, we have an audience of Turkeyville employees to act for and it's an awful feeling being this unsure. As I've said before here, once I arrive onstage on Page 4 (or maybe 5), I'm almost never offstage and that means that I'm around and available to help out if anyone forgets a line. Don't get me wrong, I'm not AGAINST being there to help out a fellow castmember, but I am almost to the point where they are expecting me to cover for them if they go up or start jumping around the script wildly. And that upsets me. I am not an insurance policy. I have lots of stuff to do and take careof my own self. Damn...

I also don't know what more can be done. I've offered the Delta House as a line-through spot. I've sat down and worked one-on-one on scenes I'm not in or a part of, I've stayed late at rehearsals and sat there doing line-throughs for the benefit of others...I just don't know. Maybe I'm being bitter. Maybe I'm being unduly upset. But I really don't think so. Quite honestly, if I can have all my lines down and be in a comfortable position with the amount of lines I have, the two of them should be able to have all that down as well. I'm not (nor have I ever been) a line-counter but I'm sure I have to have very nearly the same number of lines as the two of them. I mean...it's now or never guys!

Anyway...here I sit. Just making myself ill with worry. Eating more than I've probably eaten all week (put together maybe!) because I'm just not sure of how this is all gonna go tonight. I'll have to stop soon, because I almost never eat very close to a show, but for now it's how I'm coping with my fear of tonight. SP is outside studying lines. Which might be helping him but doesn't help me at all. I guess if it helps him, it'll be worth it.

In the meantime...AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Sadly, there isn't much else to report now. But tonight I'm sure I'll have a lot to say. So wish me luck, keep your fingers crossed, light a candle for me, and anything else you can think of. This...could get interesting.

That light at the end of the tunnel...is that freedom or an oncoming train?

Accomplished today (since the last post): Saw the gospel-type show's closing, helped with Strike, attempted a midnight line-through, ran-through the show, watched movies

So here we are. The beginning of the end. I couldn't possibly be more scared right now of what this week is going to bring. Let's start at the beginning.

OK, so I went to see the gospel-type show on its Closing Night and it was actually way better than I thought it was gonna be. Everyone was really good and just sort of threw themselves into the show, which I called a "Holy Hee Haw". There were little skits that were cute, songs about God, even a narrator-type character thanm spoke directly to the audience...Buck Ownes-style! Corn stalks in the background of the set made me think somebody was gonna come out of them at some point and give a big "saaaaaaaaa-lute!" to Antioch, Tennessee (population 549) or some such place. But it was good fun to watch them all dive in and just get it done.

The Strike went well. SP and I weren't sure if we were supposed to stay and help because we (SP, really, but me to a lesser extent) wanted to get back to Delta House and keep going over lines but we stayed for an hour or more lugging set pieces in and out and then once the really heavy lifting was done we took off. I offered the use of the Delta House to anyone in our cast who wanted to come over and run lines (my first mistake) in the hopes that would help some folks who are woefully unprepared. So after SP and I went and got some beer (my second mistake), we went back and "hosted" 2/3 of the cast in a line-through. And it was about as counter-productive as it could have been. SH, the female lead, is distracted by every little thing and give her beer and some chips and maybe a magazine or something and a new environment and she was all over the place. I actually had to become "camp-counselor Tucker" at one point (my third mistake...because it made me look like a controlling ass) and said we all needed to focus and get going on this. It worked...but only for about 10 minutes.

Anyway, after that fiasco, we all went to bed. SP was up bright and early running lines. I watched "Free Enterprise" and gave the show a quick once-over. I feel pretty good about where I am in the memorization process. I have some rough spots but it's tough for me to figure out if I just don't know them (because I know them cold in my room all by myself) or if I'm getting thrown off by OTHER people not knowing their lines in the scene. I think it might be a combination but I'm certainly not calling for line every single time. And, trust me, that's being done. It's maddening.

At 1PM we were supposed to have a line-through of Act II (the tougher of the show, line-wise) which took forever. There was a Sunday paper floating around and I made the mistake (are we keeping track? This would be #4) of starting the crossword puzzle and that seemed to open up the door for everyone to start looking through the coupon inserts and stuff, which distracted them no end. At least I knew when to put the paper aside and be a part of the scene. ARGH! I'm not saying that I was the only one who knew enough when I had to be engaged in the scene and when I could sneak a peek at the paper, but the few people who couldn't afford doing that were didn't know enough to put the paper aside and concentrate. And that's what I found most maddening. I have to try and think ahead from now on and try to be a better example. No more doing the crossword, I guess (which I have gotten about 80% of already...I'm impressed with myself!).

So after that we tried a stumble-through of the show on our new set, which is pretty cramped. But it was good to have doors where we were told doors would be and sofas and stuff. There were some issues, spacially, but it was good. The run-through...bad. We worked some stuff that sort of had to wait for the set and we were let go. SP and I returned to the Delta House, which is now exclusively ours after the two other guys left for places unknown on Sunday, and dove into our scripts. SP never let up. I looked once or twice and then watched "Fight Club".

Today we have a 2PM run-through and if that goes well, we're supposed to have the rest of the day off. Which is great. The weather looks nice and I'm all about sitting around watching TV and chatting with my Chicago peeps but I don't think that what this show needs right now is time off from the show. I would be happy if we just ran this thing three times a day for the next three days and just ran it into the ground. There's absolutely no danger in us peaking before we have an audience and it can only do us good. But there are issues with peoples' kids and who is around to watch them and blah blah blah so we might only get the one run-through in today. And if that happens it's going to take every ounce of self-control that I have not to say...something. Because something desperately needs to be said. We open this Thursday afternoon (tourist attraction = mostly matinees) and have our first audience...the owners of the place and any employee that wants to come...on Wednesday night. Some quick math tells me that that first audience is now 58 hours away. I've NEVER felt so scared of a first audience/Opening in all my life. This could potentially be a huge train wreck and I'm the one who's pretty much at the center of it.

I'm actively beginning to learn other peoples' lines so that I can help cover if the occasion should arise. I've never even considered having to do that before. Wish me luck.

In other (good) news, the Red Sox have the best record in the American League. So that's something to keep my spirits up! (---contented sigh---)

I just don't get it...

OK, I realize that I'm a large dude. I could afford to lose some weight (who couldn't), but on the other hand I don't think that I'm obnoxiously large. I'm no John Goodman, for Christ sake. I'm in fairly decent shape. And, for what it's worth, I've actually lost some weight since I've been here. Whatever.

But why is it so hard for people to find costumes for me? Weeks ago I got an e-mail asking me for my clothes sizes and I gave this woman the appropriate information. So why, when she showed up about an hour ago with costume possibilities, is everything smaller than the sizes I gave her? Did she think I was lying? Telling her that my shirt sleeve length should be a 38 when it's really a 34? What would be the point of lying LARGER than my actual size? It's just so damned frustrating. Especially after this morning's stumble-through, which was pathetically bad. ARGH!!!


(---deep breath, trying to get control of myself---)


OK, well, because I promised, here's some stuff about my character...

My character's name is Robert. He's invited by his old friend to their house for the weekend primarily so that the friend (Bernard) has an alibi while he gets together with his girlfriend while his wife is out of town. But Robert has been having an affair with Bernard's wife, Jacqueline. She decided not to go out of town...and hilarity (we hope) ensues. So Robert starts out trying to be kind of dashing but really he's a nervous guy. And as lies pile upon each other, he gets more and more nervous and fidgety and tongue-tied. He wants to do the right thing, whatever that might end up being, but he's kind of sucked into all the shenanigans by his best friend and, eventually, not wanting to get caught up in the lies that involve him and the people he cares about. It's an interesting thing to try and play. Also, it's remarkably tiring to be that nervous and fidgety for an entire show. I end up getting VERY tired early on with little time to catch my breath...as I think I mentioned here before.

So I think that's about it, I guess. I'm not in a very good mood after this morning's awful rehearsal (people still on book and unsure on entire chunks of the show, timing was off, etc, etc...) and then the costume "fitting" so I'm gonna go and see about trying to solidify some scenes and relax a little before the show tonight.

Don...I hope this was what you were sort of looking for...

Possums, birthdays, and missed opportunities

Accomplished today: So far, nothing. I can't sleep (for about the 6th or 7th night in a row) and thought I would just post.


So yesterday the story came out. One of the guys in the other show (we'll call him "Scott") who lives on the second floor here with me all the way at the other end said that at about 6AM yesterday he thought he heard something in his room. At first he just assumed it was the family of raccoons that has taken up residence under the porch or the pipes or something but then slowly realized that it was in his room. So he turned on the light and looked around and there on his desk was some sort of wide-eyed fuzzy creature. It was a little bigger than a squirrel, he said, and it could jump and climb like crazy. He ended up chasing it around his room for a while (a scene I find hilarious because I know this guy) and finally it disappeared into one of the heating vents in the floor. He originally thought it was a baby raccoon but a quick search on the Internet confirmed it was actually a baby possum.

Wonderful! We've got woodland creatures in our house. This might actually be WORSE than Animal House. So just the thought of it all was enough to make my sleep last night restless...to say the least. I asked if he had "happened" to mention it to DM at one of their shows yesterday and he said that he had and that DM was pretty embarrassed by it. Understandable. Bugs would be one thing...because, to a certain extent what can you do?...but animals?!?! Unacceptable, really. Let's all hope that it gets taken care of very soon.

She'll never see this, but today is the birthday of Mix-Master K. So I wanted to give her a shout out and hope that she has a great day. Some people will forever have nicknames and there isn't much they can do about it. Don, for whatever reason, will always be "Monkey Boy". I will never NOT be "Tucker". And Kristine will be "Mix-Master K". It just fits. Anyway, here's to you, K. I will raise a frosty beverage towards Chicago for you later today.

In the category of "missed opportunities", we ended up not going to that bar down the street last night. Once the guys got back from their show and SP came out of his line-studying hole, the subject wasn't brought up and nobody seemed much like going anywhere so I just let the topic die. It sure would have been nice, though, to get out of Delta House and see some different people. Locals, even. Ah, well. Tonight, SP and I go to see the closing performance of the show that's up now, a sort of church-y affair. Lots of traiditonal hymns and whatnot. I dunno. It's supposed to be good and people walking out of it are all hopped up on Jesus and ready to testify (or so the stories I hear would suggest) so I guess it does whatever it's meant to do so it's got that going for it. It'll also be good to see some of the folks in our show do something different. That's always fun. And, of course...there's the turkey dinner. Yum!

Finally, this morning we have a couple of invited guests coming to see the stumble-through rehearsal. The other guy in the gospel show cast (let's call him "Ben") and the leading lady's girlfriend (supposedly an Equity actress...oooooooooooooooh!!!) will be there to watch. So maybe I'm a little nervous about that. But I'll probably never admit it. I feel good about the lines, though some are WAY tough to say. But we'll see how it goes. I'll let you know later.

And, yes, Monkey Boy...I'll give some character information for ya at that point. Keep the comments a-comin'!!!!

It Came From The Barn!!

So after many requests (Don, Don/Sarah, my mom, and finally...Don), I decided to go back into the Delta House barn and document the findings that are held within. Proceed at your own risk...

I drank up a little courage and, armed only with my trusty camera, decided I needed to go back in. The camera angle here and the fact that I'm cocking one eyebrow (most likely) make it look like I'm very drunk. Not the case.

The barn opens its mouth and invites me in. This shot is taken from the driveway as I approach. I spilled some of my beer taking this shot. Um...did I say that I was armed with a beer as well as my trusty camera? I might have left that detail out. Anyway, notice the trailer with the couch in the lower left-hand corner? That's an indication, in Michigan, of status. All the upper-crust of Battle Creek have random couches on their lawn. It's "in".

The contents of the barn come into focus a bit more. I'm not too frightened. Then again...I'm a professional.

Just inside! Christmas trees and assorted decorations. Just behind this batch of crap in the foreground you might be able to see a big white box that once housed a 7-foot Nutcracker. Careful of that thing.

To the right of the main doors, a dirty couch with a table standing behind it. How, one might ask, would a nice white couch in otherwise good condition get so much dirt on it? Well...

...there's a hole right above it. Nothing is safe from the elements in Battle Creek, Michigan! Not even you!

To the left of the main doors, flats and other random set pieces. I imagine that everything is warped beyond use because who knows how long all this stuff has been out here. I've only been here a little over a week and it's rained three of the days and snowed a little bit. In fact, I'm feeling a bit warped after a week and I've been mostly inside! Who thought this would be a good storage option, I wonder?

Finally, I came across this bird. Sad, really. Some Christmas tree will never know what it's like to have a nice white dove on it because of this senseless tragedy.

So there you have it. The mysterious contents of the Delta House barn. Nothing special, I'll grant you, but the outcry for this information was deafening. And I try to be as thorough as possible in my examination of all things Battle Creek. Besides, what else am I supposed to do...study lines? HA!

Coming soon...a brief tour of Delta House itself!!! Not to be missed.

Keep the change!

Accomplished today (since the last post): Borrowed DM's car for the afternoon and got to drive (!!!), did much-needed laundry, "high-wired" the show

It's all about repetition now with the show. Just doing it and doing it and running things over and over and over. Eventually, almost everything will stick and then it's all about just going back and filling in the holes in the script with some studying. It's how I work best and, luckily, this process is turning into one of those situations. After running the show piece by piece for the past few rehearsals, Thursday night brought us an attempt at Act I, which I decided to try completely off-book. I knew there were certain sections that I wasn't 100% on (or even 50% on) but when I've been reading it for a while and then start to hear it said to me as I repeat it, it starts to stick a bit better. I call it "high-wiring" it. Where it's just me, up there without a net, giving it a shot. And while it usually makes the act run longer than it should (our time from Thursday night...nearly 80 minutes) and can be infinitely more frustrating for me, it's a process that I almost must go through for this to work out right.

I discovered this process in high school when I was doing a Neil Simon one-act. I forgot my script at home in the middle of the rehearsal process and was forced to try to run the show with nothing but my faulty memory and the help of the Stage Manager feeding me lines whenever I needed them. It was only later that I realized that it was a method that works best for me. Or so it would seem. I've been trying to do it ever since.

Anyway, I "high-wired" the act and ended up practically drenched in sweat. Fighting for lines and acting nervous and fidgety for an entire act (and show) is TIRING! What's difficult about the show is that once I'm on stage I almost never leave. And the two times that I do leave, it's for maybe 3 pages each and then I'm right back into it. In Act I, once I enter (page 4), I don't leave the stage until Intermission. That's a lot stretch of time with no break. So when I'm blocked to be up at the bar or sitting on a couch for even a few lines, I try to make the most of them and collect my thoughts a little. Because I know I have to jump right into it.

My character is charged with a lot of the "recapping" of the various goings-on of the show. And he also has to make up a lot of the lies that are thrown around so I end up having to say some REALLY convoluted things. What that means is a lot of round-about lines that go nowhere but have to be right in order for the lies (and the comedy) to continue. I'm finding those little speeches to be the most difficult. Because very often they don't make any sense. And how can I say something if I'm not sure, as the actor, what the hell I'm trying to say? I would imagine it's the same for anyone who ever has to do any technical-type acting. Like on a police or medical show. But at least there you can do some research or you have some sort of advisor there to tell you what's going on and how things are all fitting together and whatnot. Here...I'm on my own. Trying to figure out anything to help me remember how these lines are laid out. It's awful. But if I can figure it all out...I should be good.

We got our first paychecks today and...surprise, surprise...they are for a little bit more than the agreed-upon rate. Oh, happy day!! 8 more weeks of that will make me a very happy actor. Not much to report on that...it just made me very happy and maybe I felt like trying to brag on it a bit.

Everyone in the cast is really getting along. This is the second show in a row now, after "Time of Your Life" earlier this year, where the cast has been a pretty cohesive unit, onstage and off. And it feels really good. It's no fun working with someone that you just don't get along with. I guess that's true no matter what job you work at, though. Even an office job is made better by the people you have around you and interact with on a consistent basis. Evidence of that is how nearly everyone has gotten into the act when it comes to picking SP and me up at Delta House for rehearsals and dropping us off afterward and even letting us borrow their car, as DM did yesterday afternoon. We could have very easily been generally screwed by not having a car.

With the borrowed car yesterday we got the chance to find the closest laundromat and wash our week's worth of clothes. Thank God! I was very nearly at the bottom of my luggage and wondering when we'd get the chance to take care of that. But we did. And no I'm wearing all clean clothes. Mom would be proud! While I was watching the dryer finish up, I found one of those local magazine-type publications that is all local realty. Page after page of houses for sale and both SP and I were amazed at what houses cost around here. For the same amount that an ex-girlfriend of mine paid about a year ago for a one-bedroom condo just south of the Loop in Chicago, you could buy a three-bedroom two bathroom house with a finished basement, pool, two-car garage, and almost 5 acres of land. That's incredible to me! SP and I marveled at the cost of things in comparison to the city for a while, bought a couple of $1 sodas out of a machine (I guess not EVERYTHING is cheaper in the sticks), and then headed back to Delta House.

On the way back we passed the garage where SP had taken his van and noticed that it was closed. He panicked a bit. Later, we learned from one of the guys in the other show here that he had passed by later than that and saw the van up on the lift and being worked on. So we all breathed a sigh of relief. That other show closes tomorrow and the two guys living here will be leaving and if SP doesn't have his van back, we're two city actors without a car in the middle of nowhere. And that's no good at all. Hopefully, he should hear something this afternoon (um...VERY soon) and we'll be back on the road.

Tonight, all of us in the House are planning to try and go to the newly-opened bar down the road a couple of miles to just relax, have a couple of drinks, and (most importantly) get out of the House. That'll be nice. SP is getting incredibly stressed out between being unsure on his lines and being away from his wife and ailing dog and the whole van trouble thing and so I've sort of taken it upon myself to try and get him to relax a little. Not always be so anxious about burying his face in the script and to try and enjoy the vacation. He's just learned that he's got his next gig all set up (making me very jealous) so he's good for the rest of the year. It's a touring thing for school kids based in Boston and it's good money so he''ll do that for the fall semester and then join his wife and (hopefully) dog in Cincinnati just before Christmas (they are moving to Ohio in the two months he has between this show being done and the tour rehearsals starting). Lucky bastard.

Meanwhile, I'll be doing the Chicago thing, trollin' for gigs where and when I can. It'd be nice to have a steady gig for the rest of the year, but Idon't know how well I'd do if I was on the move for the entire time. It seems like a VERY unsettled existence for 5 months. Of course...if the money was good...

Sad that it has to come down to money. I guess that's the way, though.

Good thing I just got some groceries

Accomplished today (since last post): Worked the show and...God help me, that's all I've done. Studied lines (a little) and chatted with friends and...(---sigh---)

So, sadly, there just isn't much to report. I have taken a few more pictures that I need to download onto this blog and I've been working at trying to get these stupid lines figured out (there is a LOT to memorize, in case I haven't said that before) but that's about all that's gone on.

We were joined yesterday, for a few days, by an actor who used to work here. He showed up at the tail end of last night's rehearsal and then dropped by Delta House to hang with the other shows' actors. They all went out and ended up waking me up when they returned (and dude decided to take the room next to mine, of all places). He seems like a nice enough guy, but it's weird how a little intrusion just threw me way off. I went from living by myself and doing whatever I wanted in my "space" as recently as 8 days ago to living in a house where I was fortunate enough to have a small bank of rooms (or "wing", as I like to call it) pretty much to myself to having a loud drunk neighbor for the night. Odd. Not that I said or did anything about it...didn't really warrant it...but I realized how easily I can slide myself into a groove and stay there. It's something I've been doing all my life, I guess. From apartments to home cities to girlfriends to theater companies...once I find myself in a situation that I even half-way enjoy, I still with it until I'm literally clinging to nothing. Seeing only how things were in the past. And refusing to make a change.

Although when I do make a change it's usually a big one. Moving out on a girlfriend or changing cities entirely or quitting theater companies burning bridges as I go. It's good fun. But it's also responsible (that breaking wide open the groove in which I find myself) for some of the happiest accidents in my life. Finding Memphis and the theater program at Memphis State. Going to Chicago. Most of the girlfriends I've had in the past decade or so.

Yet it all also adds to that feeling that I have nothing permanent in my life. And that's a bad thing. I think that once I get to a certain age (an age that seems to have come and gone, by the way), I maybe don't want to be the guy bouncing around and trying to live as fast and loose and I want to. A little stability in this unstable existence might do wonders for my psyche. And the collective psyches of those who are around me.

I dunno.

Aaaaaaaanyway, rehearsal this morning was absolutely maddening. I tried to run Act I off-book and it went as poorly as...well, I don't know...my last few relationships? I'll say that for now but just know it went VERY badly. I would get nice little runs where I would be alright for two or four pages at a time, maybe even more, but then come to a screeching halt and have to rely on the script like I'd never even read it before. It was crazy. The blocking is easy. That's never been a problem for me. But the lines...God, they're tough. And while I guess they're coming somewhat, they certainly aren't coming as quickly as I would like. Maybe studying is really the way to go. I'll have to look into Act II before this afternoon's rehearsal. See if that does me any good at all.

And, finally, SP's car is having trouble. On our way out of rehearsal earlier today, we noticed some antifreeze leaking from the engine. Not a big deal, but we then noticed on the way back to Delta House that the engine was heating up a little too much. Getting into the "red zone" there. So we pulled over and, when nobody was found to be at home anywhere close by, we eventually pulled into a driveway and used a garden hose to put water into the radiator to get us home. So he took it to this place down the road a mile or so and they said they could fix it but it won't be until Friday and it's probably going to be pretty expensive (the labor will be the bitch of it because the engine of this van is so pulled together and tight). So I feel badly. I'll probably insist on helping him pay for it (because I'm kind of a sucker that way) and it might just get in the way of driving back and forth to Chicago as much as he was planning during the run of the show. Which would not be good. I want to go and sleep at home!!

And now we're in this awesome position of being TOTALLY stranded here at Delta House for the next two days. Since I don't have a car, we're probably going to rely on fellow castmembers to give us rides to and from and other than that...we're here. And stuck with it. Ah, the subtle joys of living in the middle of nowhere.

It makes me miss the city that much more.

Thinkin' and wonderin' what I'm gonna do

Accomplished today: Woke up early and couldn't get back to sleep, worked the show, grocery shopped, talk to my mom

So the title of today's post is from a song by King's X, one of my favorite bands. (I encourage you to look them up and listen to an album or two...it's some good stuff.) But, more than being a good song, it's also exactly what I've been doing today...mostly early this morning when I woke up stoopid early and now, sitting around after a day of rehearsals with not much to do. I knew I would most likely come out of this trip with some insight into what I want and don't want out of life, but I didn't think I'd end my first week here with anything. What I think I'm looking for right now is some sort of permanence. My "career" is not what anyone would call solid so what does permanence mean for me? Well, I would love to try and buy a place in Chicago, since I love the city and really don't see myself moving away anytime soon. That's really about the only option I have at this point. I don't have any romantic permanence in my life, so I think the housing thing is probably my best bet right now.

Well, it's not the cure for the common cold or coming up with the telephone, but it's about all I have in the way of revelations for now. Stick with me, though...I'm sure more will be coming.

As for the show, things are going fairly well. We're in that awkward time of rehearsals where we want to be off-book, but we're just not at that point yet so it's all just frustrating as hell. But we're fighting our way through and coming up with some good things. Blocking is VERY sloppy, which is frustrating for me also, but...again, it's part of the process and I have to hope that all will end up coming together to performance level soon.

I woke up this morning (stoopid early at about 5AM) with the feeling like I'm coming down with some sort of cold. Brilliant! I'm just getting my full voice back and now I get to fight off a cold. So I'm doing what I can to get rid of it but it's tough. This musty old house after two days of rain and a little snow and in the cold...yeah, I guess I should be surprised that I've made it this far without coming down with something. It's still maddening, though.

So on top of the already-frustrating process of trying to get slowly off-book and remember all the wacky blocking (remember...it's a farce so people are all over the place all the time) I'm dealing with an impending cold AND the general feelings of insecurity and lack of permanence in my life that I get to work through all the time...it's been an awesome day!

(---sigh---)

I spent a good amount of time on the phone with my mother and I realized that I am part of a family that tends to let things happen to them instead of taking control of whatever situation we find ourselves in. As she put it, we're reactive instead of proactive. We follow as opposed to leading. It's a frustrating way to live your life but it's also so hard to pull yourself out of the pattern you've always set for yourself. I'm willing to try and take some more control over the events of my life. Go out and get what I want...or at least go after what I want. It's better than sitting around and hoping that what I want just magically comes to me. I've got to be better about that kind of stuff.

Of course, I come to this conclusion when there isn't much I can do about it. But once I return to Chicago...watch out, everyone! I'm going for what I want and I refuse to let anything stop me. Especially my own insecurities. Those have to go. I guess I should stop thinking and wondering and start acting and doing. Sorry, King's X.

It's still a kick-ass song, though.

Imaginary turkeys, snow, and the Red Sox

Accomplished today (since the last post): Finished blocking the show, studied lines, found a sports bar to watch baseball, got drunk, didn't do much

Well, the first victim of stir craziness would have to be, after all is said and done, SP. Yesterday morning, I came downstairs to find him talking about wild turkeys running around the yard. Of course, there was nothing out there when I looked. I think he's been drinking the water here. I need to try and ween him off of that before he starts seeing big pink elephants wandering around onstage during a performance!

Anyway, we finished blocking the show Saturday morning in a marathon 2 hour rehearsal. That left us with nothing to do from noon on Saturday until 10AM on Monday. Almost 48 hours with nothing going on. (---sigh---) What are we supposed to do? So we studied for the better part of Saturday afternoon and then decided to try and go find a sports bar late in the afternoon to watch the Red Sox/Yankees game (SP is a Yankees fan). That led to a lot of drinking, which I think was exactly what we needed to relax. I passed out pretty late (we found John Carpenter's "The Thing" on TV and I think I made everyone watch it all the way through) and slept until about 11AM.

Today I studied for a while and then just couldn't do it any longer. So I watched TV (SP found, of all things, "Animal House" playing!!) and then SP and I went to get some KFC (acronym warning!) and then watched ESPN for the rubber match of the Red Sox/Yankees series. That's what I'm doing now...watching the Red Sox hold on to a 7-4 lead over those cheaters from New York. And I got to hear from my brother during the early innings so it was a good day, all-in-all.

It was cold this weekend, as expected, and actually snowed through most of the day today (though none of it stuck). But since I didn't have to go outside too often, I was fine. It just gets a little cold in the morning. Of course, I'm not sporting much in the way of blankets so it's understandable that I might be a bit chilly. Whatever.

So I guess tomorrow morning starts the real push towards Opening. Blocking is done and now it's just running and running and working and all that stuff. Which is always the best part for me because the more we run stuff the easier it is for me to memorize lines. I've never been one to just sit and learn and that's why I didn't do too well with the recent understudying gig that I had. I need the physical reinforcement of the blocking to go with the lines. That's, I guess, just the way that I roll.

Or something.

So this afternoon I quickly put together the blog site and will slowly put it out to people. I also have put some pictures onto the laptop, which was kinda cool. Now I know that I can do that so the more pictures I can take, the more pictures I can put on the blog and show what I'm doing and dealing with here. So that's good.

In the meantime, I'm trying to get people to come up here and visit. I'm hoping that I can get a few people here. It'd be fun to have friends from home around, even if it's for a day or two. So if you're reading this and want to come up and visit, I will tell you right now...COME! PLEASE COME!!! You'll have a good time, I swear you will. At the very least I'll promise to buy you a drink and some sort of turkey meal of your choice.

That's about the best I can do for now. Maybe I'll be a bit more generous or giving when you show up. For real.

Slowing down the pace

Accomplished today: Blocked pages 42-56

Not really much to report from today. We had rehearsal this morning at the church and got let out around 12:30 or so. “Old Rugged Cross”, the show that’s currently running, has two shows today so since half of our cast is in that, we don’t have another rehearsal until tomorrow morning. Then not again until Monday.

SP is awesome about locking himself away and studying lines. I’ve been on the laptop all afternoon reading e-mails, Red Sox blogs, sending instant messages to folks, and looking around for auditions in case I can squeeze a couple in when I run back to the city with SP once we open. So he’s being the good student and I’m being…well…the student I’ve always been, I guess. It’s not that I don’t care, really. It’s just that I feel like we’re not quite so under the gun as SP seems to think. Which is fine. I’m just more laid back about it, I guess.

Anyway, the rain came down like crazy a little earlier today and now it’s really sunny. Ah, that lovely mid-west weather! I’m about to head out into the barn in the backyard (yes yes yes, there’s a damn barn in the back) and see if there’s a bike or something out there fun. If there’s a bike, then I might feel like I’m better able to get out and get away a little bit.

Anyway, I’m about to go out there and see what’s what before it starts getting too dark (and, therefore, potentially dangerous). Sadly, I just have nothing much to report from here.

Sorry.

Alone Again (with just my thoughts), Naturally

Accomplished today: Blocked pages 16-37

What to say about today? Our first truly awful day here in God’s Country. Not that it has anything to do with the show I’m actually rehearsing, mind you. It’s just been all rainy and overcast and generally ugly all day. And now it’s thundering out and I’ve seen flashes of lightning. And, according to everything I’ve heard today, it’s not going to stop until Sunday…at the earliest. It’s also going to get cold. Like…snow cold (over the weekend). Wonderful. So I get to live in an iffy (at best) house that may or may not end up being the World’s Largest Collander and drive to rehearsals over roads that looked earlier today for all the world like they were about 4 inches away from overflowing. So either they will become impassable or just frozen over into a huge ice slick. Either way, maybe I’m most glad that I’m not driving at all the next 9 weeks. Or at least for the next few days.

I dunno. Maybe I’m being too negative. I don’t like that this might sound like I’m bitching. I’m just not sure of what might happen. And it’s not just this situation. I panic at the beginning of anything new. In a new apartment, I will wonder if the stove is leaking gas. In a new city, I will wonder if I’ll ever find work or an acting gig or a girl to love (or simply pine over, as is usually the case). In a new relationship, I will wonder when the camera crew will jump out from behind a building or tree and announce that I’ve been the victim of some wild prank.

Well, to be fair, I wonder that for the duration of the relationship. God, I need serious help.

But this is different. Everything is just kind of out of my control. I’ve already gone to as many lengths as I could think of to provide myself with some comforts of home in this foreign environment. And nothing I do seems to be working. Today I rehearsed for about 6 hours and the rest of the time I’ve been kind of left on my own to review the decisions and events of my life and wonder what I did right and lament about what has gone wrong and…this can’t be healthy, can it? It’s not any of it anything to put into this journal, because this is supposed to be about the adventures of an actor in a completely new situation, but it’s a frightening thing. At least in Chicago I had the added bonus of almost constantly being distracted by this or that. Going to see shows, hanging out with friends, places to drink within walking distance. Here? I’m trapped. Trapped with only my thoughts, this computer, and a wireless Internet connection. My constant companions.

Yup. I need some serious help.

So rehearsals are going well (back to the task at hand). We’ve now blocked just over half the show (which, by the way, is "Don't Dress for Dinner", a really well-written and funny British bedroom farce). Not too shabby, really. For a farce of any kind, knocking out the blocking like we’ve been doing is kind of impressive. Testament to the fact that a director who has actually given some thought to the way the show might end up looking (has does his/her homework) is an invaluable asset to a production. DM knows what he wants. But he’s not so tied to those thoughts that if someone in the cast throws out an interesting or funny idea, he will dismiss it outright. He has, on several occasions, gone with something that an actor did or that just “happened” over his own idea because he likes it better. And that is so very nice to work with…especially after Joe from “The Time Of Your Life”, who assembled this kick-ass cast of talented folks and then didn’t want to hear any of their (our) ideas about anything. THAT was incredibly maddening.

Yesterday the blocking just dealt with myself, SP (who is very good), and SH (SP’s wife and my mistress). I dare say that we’re sort of playing against type in this one. But what we each might lack in the “usual things” the characters might require, I think we each make up for in various ways. It’s fairly interesting. Anyway, today we added HM (as SP’s mistress) and JF (who is actually quite good as the cook) and it’s getting to be more fun. We’re each finding nice character things to play with and off of and it’s just a good time. I’m supposed to be caught in a compromising position with JF’s character at one point and she was very uncomfortable with it. Not to the point of asking for it not to happen at all (which would have been awful) but just not wanting to dive right in with it today. I mean, it’s understandable, I suppose. We’ve only just met, really. And the last thing any women wants just after meeting me is a simulated (or real, for that matter) buggering from behind. But anyway, it’s just nice when the “what the fuck” attitude is there. My best memory of that attitude is when Amanda joined the “Rocky Horror Show” cast a week into dance rehearsals and she was thrown into a simulated sex scene with myself and Shannon-Boy-Shannon, who I’d known for a few years. We got our orders (“create something provocative”) and she turned immediately to me and said “well, I guess you should put your hand on my breast”. I sort of fell in love with her a little bit at that moment. Anyway…I like it when people just go for it. That’s not to say I think any less of JF. She seems genuinely talented and I’m left to wonder why somebody who obviously had big dreams (you should see the knockout headshot she uses, which is probably more than a few years old at this point) and aspirations of fame and fortune (or whatever) decided to end up in or near Battle Friggin’ Creek, Michigan. Of all places! There’s a story there and I might just have to distract myself from all my “life thoughts” long enough to try and get that story out of her.

Hey! I have a project!! This could be a good thing for me!!

You only miss commerce when it's not always slapping you in the face

Accomplished today (and since last post): Arrived in the heart of Michigan, did what I could to “Tuckerize” my assigned room, explored local scenery, slept for shit, read-through, high-lighted, blocked pages 1-15, grocery shopped for the rest of the week

Geez…I guess I’m supposed to make a wish or something. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do when all the numbers on the clock are the same? I think that’s right. I haven’t thought about that in a long time. But there are so many things that I could wish for…

Well, I missed THAT opportunity. Who knows when I’ll get to wish myself out of here? Or date the girl that I really want to date? Or be friggin’ happy, REALLY happy, with my life for the first time in as long as I can remember? (---deep sigh---) Maybe I’m being too harsh. Let’s review the current situation. The current Michigan situation. All that other crap will have to take a backseat for now…

Actually, this isn’t quite so bad. Jesus Christ, I’m getting paid a (barely) liveable wage acting. Should I repeat that so that it sinks in? Nah, I don’t think I will. (That would make for a REALLY boring journal.) But it is pretty good. It feels good. And except for this nagging throat “thing” that has kept me from being at anywhere close to full voice, I guess I feel pretty good about it all. The director seems nice enough and open to anything as far as staging, Sean is great to work with, and the other actors seem to be all-in-all a capable bunch. We’re not breaking new ground here. We’re not recreating a new definition of “art”. But it’s gonna be good for what it’s supposed to be…tourist attraction dinner theater. And I think Sean and I will be very good. Central damn Michigan isn’t gonna know what friggin’ hit it!

Some lows…the house is for shit. I overheard SP on the phone earlier jokingly telling a buddy that the building should probably be condemned and the very first thought that came to my mind was that perhaps the only reason it’s NOT condemned is because there isn’t a full-time resident here. I dunno anything about the laws and regulations governing housing and condemning and such but that would be my first guess. And, in fact, it WAS my first guess. It leans to the left as you’re looking at it from the street, it’s got half-finished walls and ceilings and there are semi-exposed wires and cords everywhere you look, but with a little love and the correct cleaning supplies (industrial strength), it wouldn’t be too bad a place. Sadly, I’d feel like a big old chump if I were to just go ahead and do that some time. And I have better things to do like type this out and watch TV and instant message folks back home. Oh, and learn lines, I suppose.

This is going to be one bitch of a show to memorize. So I’m not sure why I’m bothering to try and document this trip right now, but it feels like the right thing to do. And besides, repetition is the best way for me to learn lines, not hardcore sitting down and studying. In fact, I’m not even sure how one would go about such a thing. Maybe that’s why I was never so good at school (not enough repetition) but I know, deep down, that I should be at least trying it. And if it helps me learn a few more lines or have them all stick just a rehearsal or two faster than not doing it, I guess it’s a good thing. But there are so many other things to do. Time-wasting things. I should really get to it.

Before I go, though, I should say that there really isn’t a whole lot to Battle Creek. I admit to sort of being excited and relieved when I realized that I would actually be living in a city (such as Battle Creek appears, on paper, to be) as opposed to the boonies somewhere where perhaps the biggest thing around was some sort of Paintball castle/field but it’s very much the latter and none of the former. Sean and I have to drive for 20 minutes (at a healthy clip, I might add) just to get to what I imagine has to be the Retail Center of Michigan: a Meijers, a Super Wal-Mart, a Target (thank God!!), some kind of mall, and lots of different fast food places and gas stations. We live 7 miles away from the theater and maybe 4 from the church where some of our rehearsals will be taking place and for a 10AM start time we left the house (which, by the way, we’ve taken to calling Delta House because of its resemblance to the frat house in “Animal House”) this morning just before 9:15AM. This is so we could drive all the way to the Retail Mecca (I’m trying out different names for the area), get some Starbucks, and drive back to the church. Yikes! I fully admit to looking forward to when the show is up and running so that maybe SP and I can jump in the car and go deeper into this mysterious place called “Battle Creek” and see what the story really is. Because right now, I’m not impressed. And isn’t that what everyone and everything and everyplace should aspire to…impressing me?

Yeah. That’s what I thought.

Good-bye, you City of Wind

Accomplished today: Finished packing, lugged four bags around city and Union Station, had doubts upon doubts upon doubts, shed tears for some reason

Well, the adventure begins. I’m scared as hell but there is, quite literally, no turning back now. I’m on the Amtrak train and headed into the wilds of Michigan. Battle Creek, actually. Dragging all of my stuff around Chicago and, then, Union Station was kind of an adventure all on its own. I opted for the cab from home to downtown after I got outside and it started to rain. An omen of things to come? Maybe. So I got to Union Station and it really hit me. I am leaving this city for two months. I have opted out of four different shows, I have chosen not to crash the Steppenwolf auditions next week (which might have been a good thing for me to do), and I have quit my fairly steady and easy day job to do this crazy gig out in Turkeyville, USA. Yikes.

I dragged my four bags all the way down the length of the train to get on and ditch my bag wherever I could and get a seat. I settled in as the other passengers boarded and found their own places to sit. I condensed and got myself situated. Before too long, a very attractive alterna-chick walked by, all pierced lips and dressed in pink and asked the guy in the seat in front of me if she could sit next to him. He’s got that 13 year-old fuzzy half-mustache thing workin’ and he’s right this minute impressing her (in all seriousness…I’m baffled) with his Rubix Cube prowess. An omen of things to come? I’m frightened.

There’s little chance that I would be able to find a wireless connection on a moving train so I’m not even going to try but it would be nice to send out e-mails or IM some folks (they know who they are). Just to have some sort of contact with people that I know and like. (Yes, even ex-girlfriends, I suppose.) Maybe it will help ease me into this whole “being completely out on my own” thing. But then again, maybe this is all just better done if I do it like a band-aid or something. Rip this free. Just…be gone without looking back and without regretting what I’ve done or how I maybe have handled some things or without worrying about what might lay three hours East and two months in the future. Or maybe I’m just trying to make myself feel better by, once again, over-thinking things.

The train has stopped. We’re letting a very slow freight train play through. Or something. I don’t even pretend to know how these things (scheduling and all) might work. So I’m just a captive. Stuck in this tin can with attractive young girls, child prodigies, and other assorted strangers. I’m not yet out of Chicago and I’m on a stopped train sitting next to another now-stopped train over a highway I’ve probably been on but don’t recognize. Static, unable to do anything about my situation, over-looking people who are going somewhere, in my own head about everything…Jesus, you don’t need to be any kind of genius to see that this is very much a metaphor for my life. Want more proof? I’m going to go get a damn beer.